Proven: Our Relationships Influence Us

Do you have relationships with certain people where you walk away feeling like you have a little more pep in your step? Or, are you ever around someone, and you find yourself wishing for the interaction to be over because it feels so draining? These are two different experiences we can have from our interactions with people. These interactions impact us more than we realize and the importance of who we most frequently interact with has a huge impact on our success or our failures.

“According to a social psychologist Dr. David McClelland of Harvard, the people you habitually associate with determine as much as 95 percent of your success or failure in life.”

Our Accent Can Even Change!

Our lives are heavily influenced by the relationships that we have. Whether you are surrounded by people have unhealthy habits, healthy habits, negative thoughts about life, positive thoughts about life, or anything else, you tend to think like them. What you think influences what you do. So, if the people you are closest to have limiting beliefs about life possibilities, you are likely to have limiting beliefs too.

“People inspire you or they drain you. Pick them wisely.” – Hans F. Hanson

Have you ever spent time with someone and you suddenly find yourself using the words they use, cursing more, or even speaking in an accent? I have! If I’m around someone with a southern accent, I find myself wanting to say “y’all.” It happens so quickly and seamlessly that I don’t even realize how much I’ve been influenced by it. We are all influenced by other people in large and small ways all the time.

People Influence What You Think, Say, Do, and Become

A large part of your success is having exposure to people who dream big and who you see as being successful. These people will influence what you think, say, do, and become. Some people hold us back while others help us to propel our lives forward. Looking around at who you are surrounded with is the first step to making sure you’re surrounded by people who will propel you. The relationships that give us positive energy can change every aspect of our lives for the better.

It’s Not About Cutting People Out of Your Life

Take a moment to pinpoint the five people who you spend the most time with. If any of them drain your energy, that’s good information, but it doesn’t mean that you need to sever your relationship with them. You just have to monitor your contact with them, while finding alternatives to raise your energy. Other options may be listening to uplifting podcasts, reading personal development books, or reaching out to connect with other positive people. It’s not about cutting anyone out of your life. It is about maximizing your interactions so that you can spend time in a way that shapes your future for the better.

Take Some Time to Reflect on Your Relationships

List the five people who you are around the most?
What is one positive word and one negative word that describes the five people you are around most?
Who are the people you know who you most admire?
Are the people you spend the most time with and the ones that you admire the same people?

How We Can Help

If you want additional support, we offer some great options:

  • We offer support groups, workshops, and wellness retreats in additional to mental health counseling and therapy. You can find more details at