Finding Resiliency Through Adversity

Everyone experiences difficult times or a crisis at some point in their lives, but the best lesson is finding resiliency through adversity. When faced with difficult times, it can be hard to imagine that the experience will lead to you being stronger or wiser. However, you can grow from the challenges you face. 

One of my favorite books is The Book of Joy. The author spent a week interviewing Archbishop Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama. These are two men who have experienced immense suffering, so they are well qualified to speak about the benefit of adversity. The Archbishop says, “it is how we face all of the things that seem to be negative in our lives that determines the kind of person we become”… “nothing beautiful in the end comes without a measure of some pain, some frustration, some suffering. This is the nature of things.” 

Adversity can make you appreciate things more.

I know with absolute certainty that the most difficult experiences in my life have made me into a better person. Of course, I wouldn’t want to repeat these experiences, nor would I wish them upon anyone else. But, it has been during the most painful times in my life that I realized and appreciated all that was good in my life: Whether it was the friendships I had, the sunrise in the morning, or the clean water I drink. I found the ultimate gratitude through my experiences.

Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed of an equal or greater benefit. -Napoleon Hill

Resiliency is your ability to cope and overcome.

Resiliency is an important part of our ability to turn the negative life experiences into positive ones. It is also your ability to cope, to seek out supportive resources, and to overcome without being pulled down by challenges. For more information on resiliency, check out this blog post: 5  Questions to Help You Find Your Resiliency and Feel Better.

As the saying goes, “when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” We do have a choice. We can choose to stay in a place of victimhood, or we can choose to be survivors of our experiences. We can also use our experiences to help ourselves and others. When we choose a survivor mentality, we can focus on overcoming the negative event rather than being defined by it. Because healing and moving on is extremely important for each and every person’s mental clarity.

Finding resiliency through adversity is just a matter of perspective.

Melissa Shaw, a couples therapist at Knot Therapy says “when the rain falls, it doesn’t stay on the mountain, it goes to the valleys. The green lush water is in the valley where everything grows. Don’t check out of the growth.” The valleys in life aren’t what we are usually aspiring to end up. We can find ourselves in valleys while looking up to find the mountaintop, but the valleys are where we find our bearings, learn about ourselves, and create a plan for climbing the mountain. The valleys carry a benefit for us.

Take a moment to consider the challenges or adversities of your own life. What have been the unexpected benefits from these challenges? Do you consider these adversities a part of making you more resilient and stronger as a person?